letters to tao

Saturday, December 03, 2011

A few more words

added to the previous, as these will be added to in turn, if I can keep up this discipline for more than a few days. I should take advantage of the freedom of being alone in the house, although certainly not in the building, being in Madrid and all. I always wanted to avoid exactly what I have right now. In so many ways, and to start to work on having what I want instead. I 'spose it's knowing what I want that is the problem. Painting, drawing, abstract, realistic, hyper realism, illustration, cute doodling, a children's book, a set of sheets, I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it now. Sung with passion and gusto, and completely in tune, to the tune of the analogous Queen song. Well, I just realised that the previous entry in this inauspicious blog, was actually this very same day, the one known as today. Having set the alarm this morning without changing the programmed hour, I was gently awakened by the beep, beep beep, although they are not the strident beeps of so many similar devices, but rather a gentle Chinese rolling balls sort of soft chimes. At least the first ones are that. If you ignore them, well they start to get all upset and in the end they are quite fucking insistent, although I don't really know why the gratuitous swearing there as I never allow the thing to go of for more than a bing or two, unless I have forgotten that I left it plugged in recharging far from my bedside and after batting for it in it's usual spot I finally have to panic and fly out of bed to get to it and shut down it's infernal din, although really it's not that bad. So, the upshot, at least for this stanza is that this morning although I had intended to get up at seven o'clock as I would usually do on a Saturday, I instead was gently woken at five AM and didn't even realise until I had raised myself to a standing position after having asked for ten minutes more once, and only once. I had already dressed, which being Madrid in the start of the winter, is not among the coldest places on Earth, but I bet my long lost childhood friends from places like Blackwater QLD would think it was cold enough. It certainly is cold enough for me. Too fucking cold actually. So once I had realised, the dilemma. Stay up or go back to bed. I imagined (as usual) all that I could get done in such a free gift of hours. So I took my clothes back off and got back in to bed with my Eni chiquitin, who hadn't moved a muscle really. But it wasn't for long. I was playing over in my mind the film about the successful artist, who never stops, and did just that:- never stop. So now it's the end of Saturday and I'm going to post.

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